I'm a father, manager, programmer, scrum master, geek, & movie lover.

Ongoing Misadventures

Heres when you will experience “blogger burnout”: 1. when your internal dialogue gets hijacked by your concerns about what your readers will think. 2. when you are afraid to write down what you are truly thinking about at that moment. 3. when you believe the lie that some people just arent capable of good writing. 4. when you believe the lie that there is a certain way that you “should” write anything. 5. when you get more involved in punctuation, spelling, or aestetics than saying what you want to say. 6. when you get caught up in traffic, hits, popularity, readers, and/or fame. 7. when you believe the lie that what you think doesnt matter. 8. when you believe the lie that what youre about to say has been said before and/or written down better. 9. when you forget that most ideas can be expressed in less than 15 minutes. 10. when you dont set aside a little bit of time each day to update your blog. 11. if your blog feels more like a “have to” instead of a “get to” youre writing about the wrong things.

Comments from my old blog:

derek said: My pic got squashed somehow so that I look shorter and fatter :( I’ll try to fix it later tonight, if I have time. at 2005-06-09 21:47:38

mom said: i still think internet dating doesn’t work out in the long run, its too easy and impersonal even when you are not being that way. As for your picture, you look fab! even though i know you are one of the kindest and gentle people i know. hugs, mom at 2005-06-10 00:47:30

BigDaddy said: Derek’s mom is wrong on that count. My sister met someone via internet dating and they are married for 6 years now and have two kids. It’s not HOW you meet people that’s important it’s WHAT YOU DO when you meet people that matters. at 2005-06-10 16:26:40

mom said: oh i think there are times when it works out for sure, i am just saying that when you meet someone in person, you know faster if there is a connection. When you meet online, you spend time on the relationship and then you may meet them and not have that physical connection. By then you have invested lots of time and may not want to just stop there because of that. It does work out for some, i just think i have a valid point, and so do you. good luck to all at 2005-06-10 23:11:22

tania said: glad you’re mobile and working out and meeting new people and are happy. :) i agree with BD. it’s what you do and what happens when you meet that matters. good luck. at 2005-06-11 04:51:29

dad said: Chemistry is chemistry and no amount of words will change what you feel when you meet that special person…it can be as simple as eyes meeting across a crowded room….you can talk till the cows come home and feel a connection but the true test is seeing that person and looking into their eyes…if you click..everything said from that moment on takes on a new dimension….but hey…that’s just me lol. at 2005-06-12 15:56:03

James Trott (UK) said: And I will Mr. Martin! And I Will….. MUAHAHAHAHA!

(Richard)[] said: Hey, I married my sweetie 2 months ago and I met her over the internet. Internet dating is just another way to meet new people. Nothing more and nothing less.

I have noticed that once you get a certain age, you don’t meet as many new people as you used to. That’s maybe because most of your friends are getting married (settle down?) and in my case I would go out less than when I was younger. So this was a great way to meet new people.

It can work but I do believe that people need to think of how they deal with it. Talking to somebody online for a long time is not the best thing since there is a difference between an online and real life connection (and I have learnt that too ;)) at 2005-06-17 21:09:34

Craaazy Afternoon

Take Back Life

Fuck it. CSI will no longer suck up all my post-work life. American Chopper won’t make me wish I had a $100,000 motorcycle. Mythbusters won’t make me feel like my job isn’t nearly cool enough. Films are different. They’re larger than life. A cinematic experience. You can’t experience the stuff of most movies in your life, whereas you can experience most of TV in your life, if you’re willing to live on the edge, which I am. Instead of living through these virtual media, I will hang out more. I will make new friends. I will get to know the friends I have in a deeper way. I’m even thinking of ditching email in favour of the telephone/VOIP. I’m just not sure I’d be able to manage that yet. I have so many distant friends… I’ll keep watching films. I’ll play chess more often, with more people. I’ll finally learn guitar, and play it on the beach at sunset. I’ll go swimming on a regular basis. I’ll learn to be a carpenter, and figure out the basics of electronics. I’ll get in shape and turn my body into my temple. I’ll go to the buddhist temple more often. I’ll re-do my blog, at long last. End of rant. Beginning of life. Derek PS — The photo @ right is of me drinking a bottle of red wine at Jim Morrison’s grave in Le Pere Lachaise Cemetery in Paris, France.

Comments from my old blog:

Emily A said: You inspire :) … at 2005-06-23 04:06:58

Dinko said: It’s all true. But it’s also “wishful thinking” stuff about changing radically your life. You can’t do that, because you don’t have motivation for that, higher value. You would watch TV also here in Croatia if you could understand Croatian. And it’s easier to be better person in foreign country than yours. Come back here and you will not watch TV. But in 5 years you will be the same as in Canada with just a little differences. It’s illusion that you can change something just by thinking you should do that, because you are not only your brain, mental aspect of your life. Your personality with emotions is more complex than that. If it’s all that easy people would not smoke, drink, be depressed…

Maybe you are just sad that you are not coming to Croatia for a summer vacation this year as you once planed.

at 2005-06-23 08:27:21

mom said: you are right hon, i hardly ever watch tv, I spend almost all my free time with friends and its great. If i am over tired and need to just chill before bed i watch, but if i am lonely, I just call a friend and do something, or talk on the phone. Life is way too short to spend it in front of a box. Thats not to say that I don’t occasionally immerse myself, but very rarely. If I do, it is almost always as background for whatever i am doing. I have many great friendships and that is partly because I spend time with my friends, we cultivate and nurture each other like a garden. I hear many people say if you have 2 great friends in your life you are lucky, and thats true, but i have so many more than that because we put the time in to be friends. It is awesome! Off the top of my head I can think of at least 10 close friends that I can say anything to and that know me from the inside out. They are a part of my life that makes living fun. Have a great one! hugs, mom at 2005-06-23 13:59:04

(Julian)[] said: Use sage tv to record meaningfull and educational television shows. TV is a medium with a lot of art and even more trash… But what your choosing to do is cut yourself off of the entire medium because you don’t have the disicpline to seek out the good stuff ( It’s there you know it… ) and filter out the bad stuff (CSI, American Chopper etc.). Cinema is the same way art and trash with more of the latter than the former. Don’t blame the medium. Blame yourself for abusing it. If you want to take control of your life do so without externalizing the sources for your current one. at 2005-06-23 15:07:34

dad said: Sometimes it’s nice to be alone with your thoughts and chill in front of a tv or computer and at other times be active and enjoy your friends…life is about balance.One instinctively knows when one wants to be alone or among people and if one is happy, more or less,i see no reason to reinvent this wheel lol…i’m perfectly imperfect the way i am at 2005-06-23 18:42:02

Unc Charles said: watching American Chopper is enough to make anyone consider a change in lifestyle,try something more meaningfull like…Big Brother…….. or better still get a labotomy and the effect will be the same. at 2005-06-25 07:17:17

dad said: Little bro’…i love watching american chopper since i like to build things….seeing how they do things and what they use to accomplish the work gives one ideas on how to do similar work with limited tools.Using ones hands and creating something out of nothing is an art which many have forgotten in this day of cheap consumerism.The banter i can do without but reading between the lines one can learn something. at 2005-06-28 19:30:47

Unc Charles said: I was addressing Derek…………………I think its a good idea to ditch the TV………………what you watch is up to you. at 2005-06-29 07:29:50

Vlad said: do I sense hostility there, Unc Charles? at 2005-06-29 16:42:34

Unc Charles said: No Vlad,just matter of fact which is my way having been to the G.W.Bush school of diplomacy. at 2005-06-29 17:34:50

tania said: so… the question is… how much tv did you watch in the week following this post? i hope you were able to do without! :) at 2005-06-30 21:43:16

mom said: I don’t know who said this but it is perfect! ” Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the number of times it takes our breath away ” That is just so sweet! hugs at 2005-07-01 07:46:41

Unc Charles said: Hope everyone enjoys the LIVE8 concert on Saturday,couldnt get tickets for our local venue,the Eden Project in Cornwall,20 mins down the road, all African musicians but a live stream is available via this case an exemption is available for all non telly watchers…………available from me at £10.00.each for a good cause.. at 2005-07-01 19:26:49

dad said: I believe that’s one of George Carlins sayings….best one i like to quote anyway.Oh and Charles….I am one of the anyones as in “it’s enough to make anyone cosider a change in lifestyle” hence my input. at 2005-07-01 20:50:32

Charles said: Tony,thanks for addressing me by my name,Lil Bro is just so patronising ,hence me getting the hump.anyhow lets look forward to Dereks next post .always so interesting at 2005-07-02 18:25:17

mom said: its great you are not on the computer all the time, but whats up? hugs at 2005-07-05 22:29:02

athionus said: i like the phone idea, talking is butter. your comment about no tv got me thinking - the year we spent tooling in beastor, i watched almost no tv, and if i recall, neither did you. that was, for all it’s grief, a pretty good year in many ways. also, i must admit, i do use the internet only as a book with a really good index, but then again, maybe i’m not geeky enough. and of course, i know TONS of really good buddhist temples, if you ever fancy a visit. you could eat live squid, perhaps? lol at 2005-07-18 11:02:05

lana said: yes!
its refreshing reading it from you.
aaahh…I can rest happy now. xoxo That being said, I have found that since I have committed to the institution recently, and have been working a more 9-5 life, TV is my vacuum when I get home to escape interaction. Not proud of it, but its true. I don’t actually have a tv though, I just stream. at 2009-07-22 01:35:31

Debbi said: Our family hit a ‘poor’ spot years ago and it was the perfect opportunity to get rid of the cable bill. For 4 years my kids had access to only what the rabbit ears could bring in. My God, did they hate it! Yet, fast forward to today…….my 33 yr old rarely even thinks to turn on the tv, even tho he has a 60”. My 30 yr old watches maybe an hour in the evening a few times a week (I know because I stayed with him for a month), my daughter never turns it on while the little guys are up (although daddy is now turning on the football games on Sunday). So, it did create a shift within the entire family structure. And since we know that subliminal messages are implanted in the programming, Less is definitely better!! Try it, you just might Really like it! at 2011-12-11 04:06:29